Reddit user expresses frustration after wife requests ‘gender neutral’ baby name for unborn daughter
A husband has spoken of his frustration after his pregnant wife insisted they give their baby girl a ‘gender neutral’ name.
Sharing on Reddit, the dad-to-be said his wife is determined to avoid “traditional” boy and girl names with their children in case they decide to make the transition in the future.
The husband, 27, said that while he liked names such as Juliet, Orion, Violet, Scarlet and Dakota for their unborn daughter, his 27-year-old wife chose neutral names such as Hunter, Scout, Payton, Rory, Morgan. and Kai as his favorites.
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He said his wife “won’t change” her stance and even threatened to file the baby’s birth certificate without her input.
In his post, the man asked for opinions on whether he was wrong for wanting a traditional girl name for his new daughter.
“My wife and I are expecting a baby girl in June,” he explained. “We both agreed that we wanted to know the gender of the baby just out of curiosity as this is our first baby.
“We’ve been together for eight years and married for two. We’ve already talked about the baby and we’ve discussed how many we plan to have, where, what age gap we’d like them to have. be, etc. Names hadn’t been a problem until we found out the gender.
“I love the name Juliette for a baby girl, but my wife says she doesn’t want a traditional girl or boy name, she wants a gender-neutral name in case our kids decide to make the transition.
“She won’t move”
“I agree that there are beautiful gender-neutral names – like Riley, for example. But even that name, she says, has become more feminine.
“I mentioned to him that most people who transition end up changing their name to one they identify with, so even if we were to give them a gender-neutral name, they might end up changing it.
“I also mentioned that some people change their names just because my grandmother was one of those people, and I used her as an example, but she won’t budge.”
The husband went on to say that tensions had risen above his wife’s position.
“My wife has kind of threatened not to give me a choice and will tell the nurses and doctors ahead of time not to ask me for the baby’s information for the birth certificate,” he said.
“I think that’s ridiculous and a name shouldn’t take away any rights or opinions about my little girl.”
Many Reddit users agreed that the man’s wife was “overthinking” the issue.
“Believe it from a trans person, your wife thinks a lot more,” one said.
“Your child can always change their name whenever they feel like it, so choosing a gender-neutral name won’t matter much.”
Another said: ‘I’ve seen trans people completely change their name anyway to get rid of that identity, like first name and last name.
“My ex always hated it because people used to assume that she had to have a dead name that sounded like her name, i.e. if her name was Andrea, they assumed that she was previously called Andrew.
“Often people don’t want to be associated with their dead name. Nikki Tutorials made a video about it, she said it was one of the first things she was asked and said it was upsetting.
A third wrote: ‘Take it from a parent of a trans child, the above is so correct. The child will change his name because it represents a break.
“Also, let’s be fair, the odds aren’t that huge that they’ll want to transition. Either your wife is overthinking this or there is something else going on here.
Others felt that the man’s wife was wrong for being so unwilling to compromise on the issue.
“I think your wife is being too hard on this. She’s taken all compromise out of the equation, refuses proper discussion, and has decided that’s her way on the highway,” one Reddit user said.
“I think it’s super unfair, it’s both you and your child should both have a say.
Another said: “I’m worried your child isn’t even here yet and she’s already threatening to cut you out of a very important part of the baby’s life because you won’t do what she wants. “